Tag: . married

Family Prayer That Works. It’s Prayer Time

Family Prayer That Works. It’s Prayer Time

Family Prayer Time

Father/Mother: Let us begin with the sign of the Cross.

All: In the name of the Father
and of the Son
and of the Holy Spirit.
As it was in the beginning,
is now and ever shall be,
world without end.

Amen.
All: Dear Jesus,
we are here to spend a few minutes
with you in prayer.
We want to pray for ourselves,
our friends and neighbours
and for everyone in the world.
We know that you came
to call all of us to know,
love and serve your heavenly Father
so that we would be one big, happy family.

Parent: Jesus, be close to us now
as we pray to the Father in the words you taught us.

All: Our Father,
who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name;
thy kingdom come;
thy will be done on earth
as it is in heaven;
give us this day our daily bread;
and forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive those who trespass against us;
and lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.

Parent: Jesus, we want to pray
to your Mother too.
We want to remember how the angel told her
she was to be your Mother.
We want to remember how she went to Elizabeth
who praised her for saying to God,
“Be it done to me as you wish.”
That was saying a big “yes” to God.
We want to ask Mary to pray for us
because we know, Jesus,
that if we are close to her,
we will be close to you.

All: Hail Mary, full of grace.
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed are thou among women
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

Parent: Jesus, as God,
you were in existence before the world was made.
Then you became a human being with Mary
as your mother so that you could tell the world
how you and the Father and the Holy Spirit
together love all of us
and want to share your holy life with us.
all praise to this Most Holy Trinity.

All: Glory be to the Father
and to the Son
and to the Holy Spirit.
As it was in the beginning,
is now and ever shall be,
world without end.

Amen.

10 Steps to Find a Godly Woman

10 Steps to Find a Godly Woman

My brother is in his final year as a college student at Texas A&M. I am writing this post for him and myriads of other young men like him—young, single men that I have conversations with almost daily about life and relationships. I know that God does not call every man to marriage, but for the many that he does, it is a good thing that they find a godly wife. Outside of salvation in Jesus Christ, a godly wife brings more joy and happiness to a man than anything else on earth. As the Scripture says, “An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life” (Proverbs 31:10–12). What man does not want to find that? A woman that he can trust with every ounce of his being. An honest woman of upright integrity that desires her husband’s success. But where does a man begin if he wants to find a woman like that? Where does he start to begin the search for a woman of such value? By no means is this list exhaustive, nor or these necessarily in order of importance, although the first one is.

1) Pursue the Lord with all of your heart

This might seem contrary to the objective, but it is actually primary in reaching it. Before a man finds a godly woman, he first finds the living God. He begins to long to glorify Jesus Christ with his life and sees Christ as infinitely valuable and worth all of his time and energy (1 Corinthians 10:31). A godly woman will not settle for anything less! She wants a man that could be a spiritual leader for her, a man that she can respect (1 Peter 3:1). So be a man after God’s own heart and don’t look back!

2) Know your value in Christ

Your value is found in the fact that you are created in God’s image and that if you are a believer in Christ, God loves you as much as his beloved Son (John 17:23). If you are seeking your validity or worth in a woman, you will not find a godly woman, because you will be looking for qualities that the world esteems rather than the qualities that God esteems. Rather, you must find your value in God’s love for you displayed at the cross.

3) Pray every day for a godly wife

If you are not praying for a godly woman, do not expect God to bring you one. Seek the Lord in prayer and ask him to bring you a godly woman. It is OK to do that. Remember, you are asking the Lord for “a good thing.” Not a bad thing. And as Jesus reminds us, “How much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him” (Matthew 7:11)! Also, pray for wisdom and discernment. God is more than willing to give that to you as well if you will ask him for it (James 1:5–8). Also, start praying for your future wife. Pray for her protection and her own growth in godliness.

4) Search the Scriptures

Read the Scriptures daily and God will give you wisdom, and the Holy Spirit will use the Word to transform and renew your mind to be more like Christ’s (Romans 12:1–2). You will read passages like Proverbs 31 and Titus 2, and you will see and learn about what God considers to be a godly woman. A vision for what type of woman God is leading you to will begin to form in your mind as you listen to the Word of God. Most importantly, your own heart and character will begin to become more like Christ’s.

5) Join a church

Do not just attend a church. Join a church. And by joining a church, I mean a church where the Word is taught as the inerrant and infallible Word of God, where the Word is taught and preached, where the Gospel of Jesus Christ is cherished, and where people are on mission to bring the Gospel to the world. Not only will your relationships with other believers be edifying and challenging, you will now be surrounded by other godly men and women who will pour themselves into your life. Also, this should be obvious, but church is where the godly women are! If you want to see a football game, you go to the football stadium. If you want to find a godly girl, go to a church.

6) Embrace God’s call on your life

A godly woman wants a vision that is bigger than her. She wants to join a man on mission that is doing something with his life. She wants to be a part of something special. It is your job to figure out what this is. What are you to do with your life? Where are you to go? How are you going to invest in building the kingdom of God?

7) Work hard

A godly woman does not want to marry a lazy man. She wants to marry a hard worker whom she can respect. She’s looking for a Proverbs 22:29 man: “Do you see a man skillful in his work? He will stand before kings; he will not stand before obscure men.” This means that it is time to put away childish things—like playing Call of Duty for hours every night—and for you to become good at something! Take ownership and pride in your work and work hard. Strive to become the best at what you do.

8) Do NOT assume that every relationship you have with a woman is romantic

You must first learn to treat all Christian women as “sisters in Christ.” It is selfish and myopic to think that just because a woman was kind and had a conversation with you that she is interested in you romantically. Instead, develop appropriate friendships with Christian women in the context of service in the church. A godly woman wants to first see your godly character on display before she wants to trust you emotionally and romantically in a serious relationship.

9) Stop asking out the pretty face

Young men will often meet a pretty girl and immediately begin to think about asking her out—without first knowing anything about her character or whether or not she is a follower of Christ. Before you ask a girl out you should know something of her character and her godliness. Find out what church she is a “member” of and how she is serving. Please, stop asking out the girls that just add “Jesus” to a long list of other interests, because there are godly women out there who value Christ above everything else. See number 5. You will most likely meet a godly girl at church or serving at another Christian organization or institution.

10) Seek older, godly men as mentors

Older men who know the Lord are probably wiser than you are. They have seen more, experienced more, and most importantly have walked with God longer than you have. They will be able to invest in your life and impart wisdom to you in ways that your peers cannot. Also, more often than not, older, godly men are married to older, godly women, who know and are mentoring young, godly women. See where I am going with this? Long story short, pursue relationships with older, wiser men. Where do you meet these men? Got back to step number 5, and join a church!

6 Tips for Being a Godly Husband

6 Tips for Being a Godly Husband

When I applied for a marriage license a year after I had graduated from college, all I had to do was pay a fee.

There was no training, no video and no job description.

In spite of the fact that I lacked many of the fundamental skills on how to make a marriage work, the license was granted!

I know there are many men today who are trying to figure out exactly what God expects of them as husbands.

So I came up with a list of the things I believe are central to being a godly husband.

1. Love God More Than You Love Your Wife

After three years of dating Mary Ann, we began to talk about marriage. A little while later we broke up. I was devastated.

While praying one night, things became crystal clear: Mary Ann had become an idol in my life. I cared more about what made her happy than what made God happy.

It was as if God were saying, “You will have no other gods before me, and if you put something or someone else in My place, I will remove it.”

In 25 years of marriage, I still run into the same problem. I keep myself in check with this question: Whom do I fear more — my wife or God?

The level of pain may be more immediate or more pronounced when I don’t please my wife. Because when I don’t please God, He doesn’t go into the other room and get silent on me.

But God reminds me, “You do the right thing, even if for the moment it doesn’t make her happy.”

2. Be a Spiritual Leader

Your wife probably came into the marriage with some idealized image of the two of you beginning each day around the breakfast table with some fresh-squeezed orange juice, doing devotions together.

She imagined you leaving for work and saying, “I’ll be back this evening, and we can have devotions again.”

About a month into the marriage, your wife was probably thinking, “What happened? Reading the Scriptures and praying together is so important.” If I could rewind my marriage and start this practice earlier, I would do it in a second.

No matter how long you’ve been married, now is the time to develop a pattern that can work in your marriage. Remember, it’s a husband who ought to initiate this.

“A man may not be a vocational theologian,” says Doug Wilson, author of “Reforming Marriage.”

“But in his home, he needs to be the resident theologian.”

3. Lead With Humility

The reason there is such a debate about whether men ought to be leaders in a marriage relationship is because too many men have not led with humility.

Men may be called by God to lead their wives, but our leadership should be selfless.

Philippians 2:3 says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves” (New International Version).

Put this verse into practice, and it will solve 95 percent of the issues you face.

I have never met a woman who says, “I resist my husband’s leadership even though he is very humble and Christlike.”

The women I’ve met are craving godly leadership in their marriages.

4. Have Godly Courage

First Corinthians 16:13 gives a clear definition of biblical masculinity: “Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong.” Before we can be godly husbands, we must be men of courage.

Wrapped up in that definition of what it means to be a man is the idea of courage.

And the essence of courage is to have such a great fear of God that you fear nothing else.

5. Be a Provider

The husband should bear the primary responsibility for the financial needs of the home.

In fact, 1 Timothy 5:8 says if a man fails to provide for his household, he is worse than a pagan. That’s not the kind of reputation I want to have in the community.

Part of the root meaning for the word provider means “to look ahead.”

A provider is one who anticipates and does the strategic planning for the household. He thinks about the goals. Not just the financial goals, but the spiritual goals and emotional goals.

In a sense, he is chief executive officer of the corporation. It’s his responsibility to set the direction.

And many times his wife is the chief operating officer. The two of them need to unify their direction for the good of the family.

6. Love Her Biblically and Extravagantly

To love her biblically, we need to ask, “What is God’s love for us like?” The essence of His love for us is reflected in His commitment to us and His sacrifice for us. That’s what our love for our wife needs to look like too.

For me, it often means placing her needs ahead of my own. And it means that I will still sacrifice for her even when we disagree. She must be my priority.

Remember the little line in the marriage vow, “Forsaking all others, until death do us part”?

That means your relationship with your wife is more important than any other relationship — friends, your boss or even your children.

Put simply, after our love for God, we must love our wives more than anything on earth. That is the essence of the marriage relationship.

D.L. Moody summed it up best: “If I want to find out whether a man was a Christian, I wouldn’t go to a minister; I’d go and ask his wife.

“If a man doesn’t treat his wife right, I don’t want to hear him talk about Christianity. What is the use of talking about salvation for the next life if he has no salvation for this life?”

This past May, Mary Ann and I celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary in Maui, Hawaii. The surroundings were incredible, but really we were just happy to be together.

Over dinner that night, we could both say that in spite of any challenges that have come our way, we wouldn’t change the outcome of our shared 25 years.

That’s because God has used our relationship with each other more than anything else to make us more like Christ. And ultimately, that is His purpose for marriage.